


Heartbeat Beat

by shirewalker



Category: The Grisha Trilogy - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Art School, Doctor/Patient, F/M, Kinda, Meet-Cute, Slow Burn, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension, ish, listen I remembered a fun post from tumblr that reminded me soooo much of nikolai, snow getaway, this is very self indulgent xD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-04
Updated: 2019-04-04
Packaged: 2020-01-04 21:27:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18352037
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shirewalker/pseuds/shirewalker
Summary: When Alina needs a check-up during a stressful time in university, her assigned doctor happens to be... hot. And her heart - which he dutifully checks - can't tell a lie. Not to the smirking doctor.Alina thinks she'll never see the insufferable - but attractive - doctor, until he's the nude model for her art class. And happens to share her love for film photography. Could she be more cursed?If one considers a growing attraction for the annoying Nikolai Lantsov a curse... yes.





	Heartbeat Beat

**Author's Note:**

> let me be!! I remembered that one post about someone going to the doctor, finding the doc hot, their heart going FAST and the doctor hearing it with his stethoscope and it screamed nikolai so much I HAD TO WRITE THIS!!!
> 
> ok
> 
> enjoy :D

 

 

 

Waiting rooms were Alina’s most hated places on earth. Their purpose was simply to perpetuate the torture of waiting for something to happen. To meet possible new parents. To realise they didn’t like you after all. To get your broken tooth out. And another tooth. And another. To be told you were too old to remain the orphanage. To find out your boyfriend was actually sleeping with the girl down the hall.

If it wasn’t for the fact that one time a waiting room had meant that Alina had won a special scholarship to study photography in Os Alta’s university, waiting rooms would be hell on earth. As it was, they were just… torture chambers. With one fluke in the way.

“Miss Starkov?” A nurse called her name.

She put aside the random fashion magazine she was reading and looked up, “Yes?”

“Come on right in. The doctor will see you now.” She grabbed her bag and followed the nurse. “Just sit down and wait a moment. He’ll be right here.” The nurse checked Alina’s papers one more time, “Just a check-up, huh?”

Alina nodded as she took off her coat, “Yeah. It’s been a year and I’ve had a few weird headaches and felt a little lightheaded at times. Better safe than sorry, right?”

The nurse chuckled, “If only more people thought that way. All right, if you need any meds afterwards, just ask at the pharmacy downstairs, your scholarship includes this kind of thing.”

“Oh, ok. Thank you.”

The nurse nodded in acknowledgement and left.

 

* * *

 

Five minutes passed. Alina was growing antsy. She wasn’t a fan of doctors and hospitals and whatnot and waiting for some doctor more than necessary was not the way to make her like these places a little more.

Another minute.

“I should just go…” She was just about to jump off her spot when the door was opened.

A tall young man entered. Clad in a white doctor coat, stethoscope around his neck and clipboard on his hands. He seemed rather young, but she had been told some doctors had retired, so maybe…?

He looked up, his golden hair shinning with a perfect glow under the ugly office lights and Alina almost had to pick her jaw off the floor. Her doctor was… hot! Saints damn her. He was very, very hot. That blonde hair wasn’t just a fluke. His eyes were of the most mesmerizing hazel she’d seen. His jaw was sculpture-perfect and his cheekbones made her want to cry. Oh dear lord, she had been single for far too long.

“Alina Starkov?” He asked. Even his voice was amazing! Alina nodded, lost for words at his unexpected looks, and he nodded. A smile seemed to dance on his lips, but he kept it at bay, leaving Alina to wonder if that smile was even there at all. “I’m your doctor for today. Nurse Bataar said it’s just a check-up, right?” Again, she nodded. “Very well. Let’s start with a few reflex tests and then we’ll check up on that heart of yours.”

 

* * *

 

“Headaches, you say?” the young doctor inquired after the physical tests were done. He was readying the stethoscope and Alina was beginning to sweat.

“Yeah. And lightheaded.”

He hummed, “Have you been under a lot of stress? Eating well?”

The stethoscope grew closer to her chest. “Well, huh… Yes. Exams season is coming up and I have a few ones to take, on top of working of a personal project.”

He pressed the stethoscope to her chest. Alina gasped. She had forgotten how cold these things were. “Breathe in…” He hummed, “That explains it. Breathe out… Perhaps you shouldn’t be trying to focus on everything at the same time.”

The cold surface travelled along her skin, making Alina wish she’d stayed home for once. The doctor was so close she could smell the sea in his hair and feel the heat of his body. And his hand… the fingertips brushed her skin rarely, but he might as well be pressing his palms with how hot and bothered Alina was growing. “Maybe, yeah. But I’m on a scholarship, I can’t really drop anything.”

“Yes, but…” He pressed the stethoscope to where her heart was beating wildly. “You should take a break. Your heart rate is quite… fast.” A pause, “Faster than average.” And then, to her eternal horror, the doctor smirked. Oh no. He knew the effect he was having on her and he was enjoying himself! That smile really had been there and it didn’t leave until he was done checking her heart, which didn’t help with Alina’s attempts to calm herself down. At all. “Well, I think you’re just under a lot of stress, Miss Starkov.” The doctor said after she was all buttoned up, “You should sleep more, eat a healthier breakfast and take more breaks between your studies. If you can’t drop anything, at least make sure to not study too hard for too long. Your heart,” His lips quirked up for a brief moment, as though his grin was dying to come back, “Will be happy if you do that.”

Alina cursed her luck a hundred times before speaking, “Ok, I’ll do that. Thanks, doctor…?”

“Lantsov.” The doctor shook her hand and flashed a smile, this one so innocent it almost hid his insufferable grin, “Nikolai Lantsov. A pleasure to be your doctor, Miss Starkov. Please take heed of my advice if you don’t want to end your semester earlier than planned.”

Alina hid her hands deep in her pockets and nodded fast, “Yes. Thanks. Good day!”

 

* * *

 

Alina sank into her seat and took out her sketching supplies. She fought back a yawn just as Nadia sat next to her and greeted her, “Bad night?”

She shook her head, “I just had a restless night.” Another yawn.

Nadia smiled in sympathy, “Did you go to the doctor yet?”

Alina ignored the butterflies in her stomach and nodded, “Yes. He told me to take it easy.”

Nadia snorted, “Didn’t need to go to the doctor to know that, right?”

Alina was about to reply to that quip when their drawing teacher entered the room, “Good morning everyone. Today, as you all know, we’re starting the live model lessons. To start things off smoothly, our model will not be fully naked.” Some disappointed groans echoed throughout the class, though everyone seemed a little thankful to be eased into staring at a naked stranger for hours, two days every week. The teacher smiled and Alina knew the good news weren’t that good, “But it’s only for today. Next class our model will be fully naked. Now, get your poker faces on, he will be joining us shortly.”

“He? Oh, I hope he’s cute!” someone from Alina’s left whispered. She agreed just for a moment, quickly remembering how someone being cute or hot had completely thrown her off the rails. No, the model better be ugly. That’d be way easier to sketch them with a poker face on.

The door swung open and Alina watched as the universe dealt her its most ironic hand.

An insufferable grin and a pair of bright hazel eyes met her horrified gaze, “Hello. I’m Nikolai. Feel free to ogle all you want.” He winked at the class before stripping down his robe and sitting on a stool, wearing nothing but a towel around his hips.

Alina wanted to die.

To. Die.

Not only had he completely ruined a perfectly normal check-up appointment, now this Lantsov dude had to ruin her live model drawing lessons? His grin turned her way and Alina knew he was enjoying himself. Damn her! And her easily blushing self! Sketching Nikolai would be a thousand times harder than sketching a naked stranger. A thousand times!

 

* * *

 

“Miss Starkov. Your posture needs to be better.” The drawing teacher scolded Alina half-way through the class. She sighed and sat straighter. The teacher lingered for a moment, “And make sure to capture his volume. I know you can do better. You’re thinking too much. Stop for a moment, observe the model, study him and then let it flow out of you.” And to make sure Alina did what she was told, the teacher took her pencil off her hand and pointed towards Nikolai.

Alina sighed and forced herself to look his way, dreading to find an insufferable grin. But there was no grin. Nikolai lounged on the stool with a quiet expression, his eyes focused in the distance. Thankful for this little gift, Alina set out to follow her teacher’s suggestions.

Easier said than done.

Because this wasn’t a complete stranger. And so Alina found it incredibly hard to be objective in her… study. Nikolai wasn’t just the owner of a handsome face. He was also the owner of a rather hot body. Which was just what Alina didn’t need. Her eyes lingered too long on his… everything. She could feel the teacher waiting for her moment of artistic enlightenment, but all Alina could feel happening was her own little hole growing deeper and deeper.

But she was an artist. She could be professional about this. Even if the universe had a sick sense of humour.

She nodded at her teacher and got her pencil back. She could do this. She could sketch like always. And she could ignore the hot doctor that happened to also be her model. She could do this.

 

* * *

 

“Earth to Alina!” A freckled hand waved in front of her. Quickly followed by a head covered in long wavy locks of red hair. “You in there?”

Alina blinked and shrugged off her wandering thoughts, “Yes, Genya. Of course I am.”

Nadia chuckled, “She’s been like this ever since our live model class.”

This caught Genya’s attention. Her inquisitive eyes found Alina’s, “Oh? Do tell.”

“There’s nothing to tell, Genya.” She waved if off and tried to focus on her milkshake.

But Nadia wasn’t done with the gossip as it seemed. “The moment our model walked in, Alina went as red as your hair and as silent as a tomb.” She went on, “And he seemed to be very interested in her as well. Couldn’t stop stealing glances from her!”

“Alina! Are you hiding something from us?” Genya insisted once more, going as far as shaking Alina’s shoulder a little. Dear Genya, always dying for Alina to have some romantic, or at least sexual, adventure.

She pushed her friend’s hand away and rolled her eyes, “There’s nothing to hide. And nothing to talk about.”

“Is he hot?”

Alina ignored this, only for Nadia to take over, “Well, if you’re into guys. Half the class was ogling him like crazy. I swear I heard some swoons when he took his robe.”

“And you’re telling me there’s nothing to talk about? Alina!” Genya slapped Alina’s knee.

“Ouch! Stop that!” Alina scooted away from her friend, “Fine. I’ll tell you. But it’s not… You’re thinking too much. He’s just… He’s the doctor from the other day.” She mumbled after a moment, already dreading all the outcomes of saying this out loud.

Genya gasped, “Oh! The hot one that made your heart rate go all funky?”

“Funky?” Nadia inquired, “What’s this funky heart rate story and why haven’t I heard it before?”

“She went to that check-up appointment and apparently her assigned doctor was young and good-looking and it made her go all hot and bothered. When he checked her heart rate… Well,” Genya chuckled, “You can guess how that went.”

“Ohhh.”

“Not ‘ohhh’. He was grinning at my reaction. He was clearly self-absorbed and today I was just embarrassed because I thought I’d never see him again!” She set down her milkshake and groaned, “And then I had to see him for two hours! See him in nothing but a towel!!”

Genya’s grin was infuriating, “Alina… Maybe you should bang him and take care of that sexual frustration…” She ducked a swat from Alina, “I’m just saying! And I’m sure Nadia agrees.”

Nadia nodded, “You two were doing some serious eye-sex every time you held gaze. Banging wouldn’t be such a bad idea.”

Alina wanted the ground to swallow her whole. Her friends were ganging up on her. And if Zoya showed up and heard even half the story, she would help them, not her. It would be a bloody murder.

Alina needed to leave, now! She stood up and reached for her bag, “I’m not adding anything to this discussion. And I’m leaving.”

“You didn’t pay your milkshake, Alina.” Genya’s voice trailed after her, the sing-song of it just another tease to add to the fire.

“You pay! You already had a show!”

Her only reply was Genya’s laughter.

 

* * *

 

At last. Peace. Sweet, delicious peace.

After two whole weeks of her friends’ teasing – Zoya did hear the story and she was vicious – and having to sketch Nikolai’s entire naked body over and over again, Alina finally had a moment of solitude in the comfort and darkness of the darkroom.

Her photography project was going slowly, but since it was a yearly project, it was all good. She looked through the lens at the miniatures to pick her favourites. There was Genya and David looking through a shared binocular. Tamar and Nadia walking through the park, hand in hand. Those two were great. Ana Kuya and the orphanage kids spending the afternoon in the local park. Her first art class, just laughing in the sun after a class on the outdoors. She had a good selection in this film. And she had a good feeling about her next and how it would look in the final project.

“Oh, sorry. The light was off.” Well, so much for well-deserved solitude.

Alina closed her eyes for a good second, took in a deep breath and slowly turned around. There, closing the door behind him, was the bane of her existence. Nikolai Lantsov. Bearing rolls of film, his camera and what Alina assumed to be photographic paper, carefully sealed inside its box.

“You.”

Nikolai flashed an innocent grin before setting down his things on a table next to Alina’s. “Me. Good morning to you too, sunshine. You look a little less stressed, have you been taking good care of yourself, then?”

Alina huffed and spared a glance at the busy sign. She had, in her eagerness for some time all alone, forgotten to turn on the busy light that would force any incomers to ring for entrance, lest they enter unannounced and ruin someone’s work. “You’re not my doctor.”

Nikolai chuckled, “Well, if you ever do a follow-up I will be. I’m guessing you are taking decent care of yourself. You’re throwing biting remarks easily, glaring at me with a healthy dose of fire and generally look luminous.” His eyes travelled across her face and Alina suddenly felt like she hadn’t left his office at all. Her heart was beating so fast, she was certain he could feel its rate racing up.

She turned around and focused on her work, “What are you doing here?”

“Cookies, clearly.” Nikolai chuckled, “I too am interested in photography, Alina. Can I call you Alina…?”

She shrugged, ignoring how nice her name sounded when he said it, “I guess.”

“So, class project?”

“Yes.”

“I’m just developing some photos I’ve taken during my last trip.” He started to get his things ready.

“Trip?” Needless to say, the man made her curious.

“I like to sail. And when I do, I take photos. Digital and film. Excuse me…” He reached for the spare magnifying lens next to her. Alina held her breath then, his arm brushing hers ever so slightly but enough to have her mind shutting down for half a second. Saints, he smelled divine! Why? Why did insufferable idiots smell so good? To torture her?

“But you’re a doctor. You’re not a student here.” She was still stuck on him being present in her campus. If he was a doctor why was he around?

Nikolai shrugged, “I only do it as a part-time job. My mother’s a resident teacher and I do a few extra services around campus, so they offer me a few perks. Like darkroom access. Their darkrooms are fantastic.”

She couldn’t disagree here. The university had excellent darkrooms. A buzz stopped her before any more words could exit her mouth and she realised she was late for her next class. “Well, this was interesting. But now I have to leave.”

“Oh? Class?”

“Yes. Art history.” Why was she telling him this? She quickly grabbed her things and made a dash for the door.

“Have a good day, then. And I hope we can share this darkroom again in the future, sunshine.”

 

* * *

 

She sighed and hanged the final photo to dry. After a week of dodging Nikolai in the darkroom and succeeding just once, Alina had finally finished the new set of photos. They did look as good as she’d suspected. Even better, actually.

A pair of hands snaked around her waist, only to settle on her hips. “We still have time…” Hot breath teased her neck, her hair in a bun and leaving her skin free for exploring. A kiss followed those words and Alina rolled her head to the side, letting out a sighed moan as the kiss grew sensual. She pressed her hips back and bit back a smile when a familiar hardness met her tease. “We still have plenty of time…”

She turned to him, “Shut up and kiss me.” She rasped before leaning back on her desk, pulling him with her. “I need you so badly… Nikolai…” She moaned as he slid a hand up her stomach and cupped her breast.

“How badly, sunshine?” He rasped against her cheek, nudging her into a kiss.

Alina let out a moaned groan, “We have time, but not that long... Stop dawdling.”

He chuckled against her lips, “As you wish, sunshine…” He reached for her jeans and—

“NO!” Alina bolted upright as she snapped her eyes open. Startled and lost, she searched the room. But it was dark and empty, save for her. She sank back into her pillows and huffed a long breath. In all saints’ names… Had she just had a goddamned dirty dream with Nikolai?! She ignored the pounding between her legs and focused on the issue at hand. Seeing him was about to become even harder. Not to mention visiting her favourite darkroom…

Her body kept asking for release…

“I hate him so much…” She groaned and settled both hands over her blankets, refusing to finish the job his dream version had started. She hadn’t just had a dirty dream about him and she wasn’t about to come to a fantasy of what would have happened in that dream. She was not!

A minute passed.

Alina groaned again.

And slid a hand under her blankets, cursing Nikolai’s ancestors for doing whatever they’d done to set him on her path.

 

* * *

 

Perhaps the universe was just making sure Alina had someone else filling her thoughts other than her ex. After all, he had been the source of many tears and months of feeling like nothing. And Nikolai… Well, he made her feel anew. Even if it was by means of making her discover what depths her anger and frustration had. Or even her appreciation of his looks. The truth was that Nikolai was an unexpected breath of… unexpected air. The jury was still out to figure out just exactly if it was fresh air or stale air.

Either way, Nikolai had wormed his way into her daily life.

And today was no different. Though this time… she had asked him to come.

“My most sincere apologies, sunshine. My mother decided to call me early today, so it was a bit difficult to be here on time.” He flashed an innocent enough smile to make Alina sympathise with him.

She shrugged it off, “It’s fine. I didn’t wait that long anyway.”

“So,” Nikolai settled down and nodded at her portfolio, “To what do I owe this occasion?”

Alina rolled her eyes, “You make it sound like a formal event or something… And you know why I asked you to come here. Unless you have amnesia, I’m sure you remember all the times you went to that darkroom and found me working, right?”

Nikolai nodded, “Indeed. Very true. So, it’s about your photography project?”

“Yes and no.” At this, Nikolai frowned and Alina had to bite back a grin, “It’s about something you mentioned a few times.”

“Oh?”

Alina took a deep breath, steeling herself for something she’d been dreading ever since realising something important. “You said that it was nice to share the darkroom because in a way we helped each other work better. And,” She looked away, ignoring the way he looked so attentively at her, as if missing a word of hers would be a capital crime, “Well, you’re right. When you’re there I do work better. You’re infuriating,” This earned an insufferable grin from the hazel eyed idiot, “And you make me so mad at times. It’s like you trigger my ‘Must beat Nikolai’ mode. I always end up working harder just because you’re there.”

Nikolai, unable to hide his grin, flashed a bit of his white teeth as his grin bloomed, “And here I was thinking it was because you enjoyed my sense of humour.”

Alina looked away.

“Oh.” A chuckle, “So that’s also a reason?”

She cursed under her breath and admitted through gritted teeth, “You drive me mad, but you somehow also make it easier to handle tough days. And Genya said…”

“Genya? Your red headed friend? Doesn’t she date my friend, David?”

“Yes. She does…” She frowned a bit at this. He knew David? They were friends?

Nikolai barked a child-like chuckle, “I’m sorry, I just know her from David and she’s… Well, there’s no denying anything she says. Go on.”

Alina blinked for a moment, lost in the conversation. Genya knew Nikolai. From outside Alina’s complaints… This demanded an extra phone call that night. “Well, she said that if you’re such a ‘positive’” she air-quoted, “presence in my life, than maybe I should ask for your help with my projects. Or studying.”

“I’ll help you with anything you need, Alina.” He said, his tone sombre and honest, taking Alina by surprise with how easily he’d accepted to help her.

“I just… Well, I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind helping me with my photography project. And maybe studying for history. I heard your mother has a personal collection that earned her some memorable grades in history… So… yeah.”

A long moment passed, silence slowly stretching to limits Alina had never seen before. And then, “So you don’t want me to do private model sessions and then kiss until we pass out?”

If Alina had ordered anything to drink by now, she would have dumped all of it on his face. No, his crotch. Yes. It would serve him so well. “What the hell, Nikolai?!”

Nikolai shot his hands up and flashed a sheepish smile, “I’m sorry, sunshine. I was just teasing. If that is what you need help with, then I will assist you. It’s true, my mother loves history and has an excellent collection. She might have some titles your teachers would approve of. Just ask them for those titles and we’ll search for them. As for the photography project… I don’t know how I could help, your photos are already brilliant, but again…” He nodded politely, “I will help you.”

Alina sighed. Nikolai was… a storm of its own making. He really could make her go from zero to a hundred and back to zero. She wasn’t sure she liked this. Not that it didn’t matter. It would still result in steamy dreams and blushed cheeks and fluttery stomachs.

“Well,” She pushed the portfolio in his direction, “The truth is that I should be doing this project with a partner. And you’re the closest thing I could find.”

Nikolai pulled the portfolio and opened it, quick to scan through her photos, “And the fact that I’m your doctor doesn’t hurt, right? If you have any spikes in your stress, I will be right there to help.” He hissed when she kicked his shin and the corners of his mouth tilted up in that grin of his that drove Alina up the walls, “That was just my way to mention that you should go to that follow-up appointment. We really need to make sure you’ve walked away from a possible breakdown.”

This reminded Alina of something, “If you’re a doctor… Why are you around the campus so often?”

“I already told you, Alina. It’s only a part-time thing.”

“Medicine isn’t a part-time thing.”

“Who says so?” Nikolai closed her portfolio and looked up, “Why can’t doctors also work in small bursts of time, like others do? I work better when I do only morning appointments and leave the rest of the day for other activities. Trust me, I tried the whole full-time thing and it didn’t work. I almost quit med school. In fact, I put a pause on it to pursue physics.”

“Because it was less stressful…?” She deadpanned, fully aware of the things David would mumble about when exams season was upon them.

“Because I could think about it on my own terms and work on it whenever and however I wanted. And it allowed me to work on my own hobbies. Living up to an idea of what I should be resulted in two years I can never get back. Instead, I took a needed break, realised some truths about myself and finished med school. Well, almost finished. I can only work at the campus’ hospital because I’m still missing a couple of classes…” He scratched his ear, obviously uncomfortable with this little extra information.

Alina leaned in, “You’re just an intern? Why the hell wasn’t I assigned a graduated doctor?” She hissed, suddenly angry at the idiot in front of her. Again.

Nikolai’s smile wavered visibly, “I’m more than an intern, Alina. I’m simply a doctor that really doesn’t want to do a couple of unnecessary theory classes. Because I’m actually a good student at everything else, I’m allowed to practice.”

“But only within the campus.”

“Yes.”

“How is that even possible?”

“I promised I would study for one of the classes and attend the final exam if they allowed me to show them I am worth it.”

“And they accepted it?”

“They did. But enough of my unique situation. Your photos,” He patted the portfolio, “Are absolutely amazing. What exactly do you need my help with?”

It was clear that Nikolai didn’t want to think about his situation anymore. And Alina understood it, more than he would ever know. So, she dropped it. “Well, my project is to document love.”

“Love?”

“Yes. Any kind of love. Romantic love, familial love. Love for arts. Love for food. Love for… anything. The idea is to show how love brings a new light to people, all in just one photo of each subject.”

Nikolai nodded, “I see. You’re talking about that light in one’s eyes when we’re doing something we love. Or talking about it. Or just holding the hands of our special someone.”

Alina smiled, the most genuine smile she’d ever showed to Nikolai, and nodded, “Yes. Exactly.”

“In some of these you can’t really see people’s faces, though.”

“Hence the challenge. I want people to feel that love. That happiness that grows from that love.”

Nikolai watched her for a moment, his eyes taking in every detail of her face. It made her feel naked all of a sudden, more than any dirty dream she’d had had made her feel. She looked away for a moment, trying her best to breathe properly again. Nikolai had this thing about him that just took her breath away. She didn’t know what it was but… It was there all right.

“I also can’t do it all on my own without sacrificing time from other things. Hence the mandatory partner part.” She added after a moment.

“If it’s mandatory, why no partner?”

Good question, “I had a partner. But then I found her banging my ex.” Nikolai palled and Alina noticed the way his jaw set in silent anger on her behalf. She appreciated his opinion on the situation. “It was ugly. And in the end I put a pause on that class and project. I restarted it this year but since I’m an extra, the teacher didn’t have anyone to partner me with. Or well, no one with a schedule that we could work with. So I suggested I’d do it alone.”

“Alina I…” Nikolai looked down, his hands knitted tight together. He seemed to rethink his words before letting out a breath and shaking his head, “That wasn’t your best idea. A year-long project all alone can be daunting.”

“I know.”

“And I’m guessing it’s one of the reasons you wound up at the campus hospital that day.”

“Yes.”

Nikolai’s mouth tugged up just a little, a shy smile unsure of whether to show up or not. “I’ll need a coffee and to go through the details of your project before we can start anything, sunshine.”

She rolled her eyes and that smile grew bold, turning her stomach into a circus of butterflies. “I’m not paying.”

“Oh no. It’s my treat.” He winked before getting up, “How do you like yours?”

She paused and tapped her chin, “Hmm, I think today I deserve a latte with whipped cream.”

Nikolai bowed, “Your wish is my command, m’lady.” And left, missing the way Alina’s cheeks grew as red as roses.

“Oh boy…” She cursed under her breath, admitting just for a moment that maybe she liked this insufferable guy a bit more than planned.

 

* * *

 

A month had passed since their arrangement had been done and already Alina had felt a change in her… everything. Her health was better, though not as wonderful as when on holidays, but now she felt strong enough to face university’s unyielding rhythm. Her mood was… as usual. Especially since Nikolai was more present now. But her project… It was going as smoothly as it could. She had made the right decision in putting her nerves away and asking Nikolai to help her. He was the best partner she could have asked for. He would go with her anywhere, take the shots she wanted and even offer new ideas. And when she couldn’t, he would go alone into the darkroom and develop the tests just to save some time.

And now, with Christmas approaching faster than expected, Alina felt like she could deliver work on time and have proper holidays.

Speaking of which…

“What do you mean spending Christmas up north?” She asked, eye on the projection as she focused the lens and readied their next photo.

Nikolai answered from his spot, “I usually spend it with mum, but this year she’s visiting her parents. I’m…” He looked for words, “Not their favourite grandson so I avoid tagging along.”

“And she’s cool with it?”

“As cool as she can be. She understands my point, even if she would prefer I go with her. Anyway, that means I’ll have our private lodge all for myself.”

At this, flashbacks of Alina’s dirtiest dreams rushed through her mind. Oh. That. That was… Yeah… She pressed her legs together and turned to him, “You want what? A weekend of sex of no strings attached?”

Nikolai blushed bright at this, “Alina! We’re friends! If I wanted to seduce you into spending some alone time in my lodge I would say it upfront and it wouldn’t be for no strings attached kind of sex.”

Alina blinked.

Nikolai blinked.

They had wandered into openly talking about sex. Together. A lot.

After a long and awkward pause, Nikolai cleared his throat, “I was speaking of us going with our friends. To spend Christmas together.” He said, his words nervous as the pictures kept playing in their minds.

Alina coughed and turned back to her work, “Oh, right. Huh, yeah. Sounds fun. I’ll ask the girls.”

“I’ll ask David and see if Tolya is up for it as well.”

“Zoya might bring Harshaw too, if he’s not too busy with his forge.”

Nikolai chuckled, “Don’t worry, there’s plenty of rooms for them to hole in without anyone hearing them.”

Again. Sex talk. In the darkroom.

The room grew hot.

Alina took in a shuddered breath, “In that case…” She focused on her task, “I guess Christmas is on you.”

Nikolai cleared his throat again, “Yes, so it is.” He cleared his throat again and Alina briefly imagined his pants and what they looked like in that moment. Saints kill her and her dirty thoughts. “Can’t wait for Christmas.” Nikolai added after a moment.

The room remained charged for the remainder of their time in it, neither making a move to handle the sudden and palpable sexual tension brewing between them. Alina wasn’t sure if she was happy about this… or not.

 

* * *

 

“I gotta give it to you, Lantsov. Your mother has great taste in lodges.” Zoya appraised the place, her cool blue eyes taking in the hall and the adjacent living room.

“Mother spent plenty of time remodelling this place after the divorce.” Nikolai replied as he made his way to the fireplace to light it up. Though the lodge had a heating system, it was turned down to the minimum, just enough to not feel like a fridge.

“She spent no expenses either. I recognize some of these items from limited collections.” She continued her observation, her knowledge of designer furniture unable to sit back and watch.

Alina rolled her eyes and pushed her friend out of the way, “Drool over fancy furniture when you get to your room, Zoya. We’re all tired and hungry.”

“Oh, don’t be such a bother. I was being a nice guest.”

“Nazyalensky, take a break from classes.” Harshaw spoke just as Alina was readying a biting remark. She watched as her friend thawed a bit at Harshaw’s words and bit back a smile. For all her mighty poise and cold demeanour with pretty much anyone, Zoya sure had a weak spot for Harshaw.

“You two already having eye-sex?” Genya sighed and dropped down on the plush seats of the sofa, “Nikolai, please direct them to their room.”

“Genya, I will kill you.” Zoya hissed from her spot.

Nikolai just chuckled, as did the rest of them. “Rooms are upstairs, I asked the keeper to put name tags on the handles so it’s easier for you guys to find your accommodations. Kitchen is through there,” He nodded at a stone arch that led to a seemingly spacious room, all in off whites and deep reds, “Theatre room is downstairs. Bathrooms are both down this corridor and upstairs. One right after the landing and one at the end of the corridor to your right.” He turned back to the fire, the little kindle growing brighter, “I’ll go take care of the heating in a few minutes. Settle in.”

 

* * *

 

“And this… is your room, sunshine.” Nikolai welcomed Alina. He took her bags and placed them by the fireplace and walked to the windows. He pushed a button and the blinds started to roll down. “You can light your fireplace as well if you want, but the central heating keeps the whole place warm enough.”

“Why both?” She asked, watching as Nikolai closed the curtains as well and double checked she had all the necessary blankets, pillows and other necessities. He seemed hell-bent on making sure Alina had nothing to worry about.

Nikolai finished with the bathroom – it seemed Alina had been given one of the rooms that had private bathrooms – and shrugged, “Well, when mother bought this place it came with practically everything, including the heating system. But that one was old and rusty so she got it replaced. There was the option to take away the fireplaces as well, but she likes them. So they stayed.”

“If the heating system fails, there’s always the old-fashioned way of heating up a room.” She chuckled and sat on her bed. “You know, I wouldn’t have minded sticking with a room without private bathroom. Maybe one of the couples would have preferred this one, no?”

Nikolai leaned on the wall, eyes cast downwards. From her sitting point, he looked almost sheepish. Was he embarrassed? But then he looked up and any signs of that sheepishness were gone, “I thought it would be best if none of the couples got this one while the others didn’t. I know we’re all grown adults, but it still felt unfair. Plus, you’re my guest of honour. I would have to be barking mad to not give you this room. Third best, if you really need to know. There’s my mother’s and mine and this one.”

Ignoring the way he called her his guest of honour was a bit hard, but Alina tucked that thought away and shot him a look, “What? Couldn’t give me your room?”

“Well…” Nikolai winked, “We could share.”

“Oh, you idiot!” She threw a pillow his way and pushed him out the room, always keeping his eyes away from her blazing cheeks, “Go away and let me change. Share... You wish!”

His laughter was light and easy, warming her whole even through a shut door, “I’ll see you in a few minutes then. Dinner’s on me.”

 

* * *

 

“Nikolai’s such a sweetheart for bringing us all here.” Nadia said as she sat next to Tamar, who was quick to put an arm around the blonde’s shoulders. Nadia rested her head on her shoulder, “This place is amazing, and it’s so nice with all the snow outside.”

Alina sipped a little of her tea and spared a glance outside. It was pitch black by now, but the lights offered a little glow to the outside, where one could see a blanket of snow if one was looking hard enough. “Yeah, it’s cool. It’s a nice change from… spending it at home.” She chuckled.

“Agreed. I’ve always wanted to do a little getaway in a place like this.” Genya said from her spot. She was scrolling on her phone for a few more moments before turning it off and getting up to place another log in the fireplace. “Although,” She spared a mischievous look towards Alina, “I suspect you would have preferred this to be just between you two, right Alina?”

At this Alina almost sputtered out all her tea, “What the hell are you talking about, Genya?”

The redhead laughed, “Oh, you know what I’m talking about. Nadia?”

Nadia nodded, “Oh yeah, Alina does know what you’re talking about. As do I, but this is about her so…” Her tone was suggestive enough to have Alina wondering if it was too late to find new friends.

“You’re the worst. You’re always imagining things where they don’t exist.” Alina’s glare could be enough to set her friends on fire, but it only seemed to summon Zoya, who arrived with a mug of steaming coffee.

“What things are they imagining now, Alina?” She inquired, seemingly uninterested in anything but her coffee.

“The obvious tension between her and Nikolai.” Tamar replied, much to Alina’s chagrin.

“The sizzling chemistry between her and Nikolai.” Genya corrected.

Zoya arched a perfect eyebrow, “Oh.”

“Oh, nothing. You’re all ganging up on me, great friends I have, huh?” Set jumped up from her spot and stomped towards the kitchen, “There’s nothing going on. And you should all go to bed!”

Quick as lightning, Alina regretted her words at the sound of the laughter that erupted after her words. She put her mug in the washing machine and sighed. This was going to be a long holiday…

 

* * *

 

Watching Nikolai work out wasn’t exactly on Alina’s list of things to do in the early mornings, but as it was…

Her eyes followed him as he ran up the path leading towards the lodge, his cheeks red enough to be seen this far. Hair matted to the head, sweatshirt marked with sweat, this wasn’t exactly an attractive look, but there were the legs that his shorts were kind enough to reveal. Alina would have to be blind to not see he had a great body. She would also have to be mad to even ponder commenting this out loud, ever.

Nikolai slowed to a halt and leaned on his knees, taking deep breaths before straightening up and stretching a little. Alina bit her lip when skin peeked between his clothes. Oh saints, she had a problem. She turned around and closed the blinds before her host could even suspect he had an audience.

She put on her warmest boots and made her way downstairs. It was a lazy morning after the whole group spent the previous day and night marathoning through the Lord of the Rings movies, and so, the house was still practically asleep. Except for her, Nikolai and David.

“Good morning, Alina. Sleep well?” David asked, a thick book in his hands.

“Yeah, my bed feels like a cloud.”

“Let’s hope not, clouds aren’t exactly corporeal.” He smiled, “But I know what you mean. They are very comfortable.” He lifted his book and Alina saw it was, ironically, a book from the trilogy they’d watched the previous night, “I’m continuing my reading. This holiday is a great excuse to just read.”

She thought back to her own books, one already finished and another waiting to be started, “Yes, I agree. I’m going to have breakfast, what about you?”

David shook his head, “I already had something, but thanks.”

She nodded, “Okay, have fun!”

They parted ways and Alina began wondering what she would have to eat when suddenly she ran smack into something hard. And sweaty.

“Woah! Careful, sunshine!” Nikolai steadied her on her tracks before Alina could bounce backwards.

She looked up, slightly afraid of finding him shirtless. But the moment of dread was unnecessary as Nikolai was still wearing his huge sweatshirt. “Oh, sorry. Didn’t see you!” She let out, her voice just a little higher than usual. She might not have actually seen Nikolai shirtless but the anticipation had been enough to have her running a little hot.

Nikolai smiled, “I concluded as much. Breakfast?”

“Yes!”

His smile ached to bloom, privy to some joke Alina had yet to hear, but he kept it tame. “I would join you, but I really need a shower before I eat. I’ll see you in a few minutes, yeah?”

Alina nodded, “Yeah, sure. Go on have that shower. I’ll just be over, huh, there.” She gestured towards the kitchen, silently cursing herself for being such a babbling idiot in this moment. Thank the saints her friends weren’t here to see this or else they’d be trading betting money in a flash.

Nikolai nodded, “I’ll be quick. That way you won’t have to eat alone.”

“Oh, you don’t have to worry about…” She started, but Nikolai was already going up the stairs. He sure didn’t want her to eat alone, huh?

Alina stood there dumbstruck for a moment, torn between being excited for his company and wishing he wouldn’t come downstairs at all.

 

* * *

 

“So, you’ve never skied before?” Nikolai asked.

Alina eyed him sideways. They were walking through the surrounding woods, boots crushing the thick snow. After breakfast, Nikolai had suggested they go for a walk, enjoy the view, chat a little. Maybe ski, even. At which point Alina mentioned that last bit would probably be just him alone.

“Why? Are you going to spend the rest of our holidays teaching me?”

“The rest?” He chuckled, “I’m a good teacher, Alina. I’m sure I could teach you enough basics for you to enjoy yourself before the holidays are due.” He bumped their shoulders, “Question is, do you want to learn?”

Alina pondered this, shoulder tingling from the brief touch, “I’m not that into skiing.”

“Snowboarding?”

She scrunched her nose and shook her head, “Nah.”

“Just good old-fashioned walks through the woods? Or maybe building snowmen or participating in a healthy snowball fight?”

Alina rolled her eyes, “As if there’s anything else to do in the snow.” She had done all of that, back in the orphanage when the first snows would roll in. She loved those days. Especially when she won the snowball fights and earned herself an extra cookie at dinner. Ana Kuya had always rewarded Alina’s unique strategy to win while staying dry, something no other kid seemed to be able to do.

Nikolai’s smile gained a playful edge, “Well, we could roll around on the snow. I hear it’s fun.”

Alina avoided his eye. Even if he hadn’t said those words, she could hear the suggestion of kissing loud and clear. Which was… appealing. Very much. All right, so maybe she was into Nikolai, to the point of wishing this was a one on one getaway, as her friends had teased her about. But she wasn’t about to push him against a tree and kiss him until they were out of breath. She lacked that kind of initiative. Or maybe she just wasn’t ready to let him know how she felt.

Suddenly, Nikolai pushed her shoulder and ran off, “Tag! You’re it!” He shouted over his shoulder. Laughter seemed to bubble out of him just as Alina’s stunned expression started to morph into shock and finally into annoyance.

“I’m going to kill you, Nikolai!” She screamed after him. Nikolai only laughed harder, the sound every bit like that of a carefree child. Saints, it was rather hard to pretend to be mad at him when his laughter was like that. Still, she ran after him.

“Only if you can catch me!” He answered, zigzagging through the trees. Several times he almost ran into them, but Nikolai always managed to dodge those bullets.

Alina’s boots crushed the snow as she rushed after him. A smile grew on her face after a while, Nikolai’s laughter happening to be far too contagious. Especially when he escaped her grip narrowly.

“Come here, you idiot!” She really wished he hadn’t left his long scarf back in the lodge. How useful would it be right now!

Her breath was growing winded. But so was Nikolai’s. His laughter wasn’t as bright as before, now it was raspier, more like barks of breath than anything else. Which meant he was growing tired. Alina faked a turn and watched as Nikolai fled in the opposite direction, his tiredness making him forget to double check.

And so, Alina ran.

And tackled him.

“TAG! You’re it!” She said between deep breaths.

Nikolai smiled at her, just as breathless as she was. Lying on his back, with his hands pinned by Alina’s, he seemed to not be bothered by this turn of events at all. In fact, it was as if this was exactly what he had hoped for.

Tiny butterflies started to grow in her stomach, dancing and fluttering as she took in the sight she was currently straddling. Nikolai seemed to glow. His hair was a mess, points aiming everywhere. But his face was aglow with excitement. Cheeks bright red, mouth stuck in the proudest of smiles and his eyes… They shinned. It was mesmerizing. So mesmerizing that Alina found herself leaning in, just to see them closer. Closer. Closer…

Her eyes fell on his lips then. Pink, soft, lush. Enviable lips. The kind of lips one found themselves wishing to taste at least once. She wanted to taste those lips. She wanted to be tasted. She wanted… She wanted to stop fretting and lose herself in Nikolai’s lips. What would it be like? Would it be any bit like her dreams and fantasies? Would it be worse? Or would it be…

A surprised gasp died on her throat the moment her lips touched his. Saints, had she been so distracted with her thoughts she had just… gone and kissed him on auto-pilot? It didn’t seem to matter to him, his mouth meeting her silent pleas with eagerness. Realising just what was happening, Alina let herself go and dived into the kiss. She cupped his face and met every pull and tug of his with presses and bites of hers. Every touch of lip had a tease of tongue and every moan and sigh had a whispered yes breathed in between heartbeats. This was a kiss that could easily erase all of her previous kisses from existence, no matter how they were. Nikolai’s kiss surpassed all of them together and every other kiss she’d dreamed of as well. Reality was sweeter than fantasy, she realised.

 

* * *

 

Nikolai pulled her after him, their laughter barely contained out here in the open. Alina crashed into him once more, his arms keeping her close as they shared another kiss. And another. And another.

Her face hurt from smiling so hard. They’d been outside running and kissing and laughing for ages now. And she still couldn’t get enough. Nikolai’s face was lit up by a light of his own. He glowed with happiness. His cheeks were adorably pink, his eyes held stars within them and his mouth was just… an ode to smiles. Alina could feel every sceptic cringing at her thoughts, but she couldn’t care in that moment. She’d kissed Nikolai at last. And he’d kissed her back. And then he’d suggested they stay outside for a little longer, the two never really straying from each other’s side for long.

“Saints, I’m so happy right now…” He whispered against her cheek, a kiss following suit.

“Me too.” A noise startled her and she looked down. “But I’m also hungry…”

Nikolai laughed, “Well, maybe we could go have lunch and continue kissing afterwards. What do you say?”

She bit her lip, “But not at home. If the girls see us they won’t leave me alone.”

“I know of a place. But we’ll need to take my snow bike.”

“Sounds perfect.”

 

* * *

 

Before they knew it, the whole day had passed by.

A few extra calls put their friends’ worries to rest, but Alina knew the next morning would be… chaotic.

“Saints, you’re so beautiful…” Nikolai whispered before stealing another kiss from her.

She rolled her eyes, “It’s dark. How the hell can you tell?”

“I don’t need to see. I know of it.” His mouth was sinfully delicious as he tracked her jaw right to that sweet spot below her ear.

Alina let out a moan, forgetting for a moment that anyone awake could hear her if they wanted to. “Nikolai…” She whispered, “We can’t stay here, someone will catch us.”

He chuckled, “I was not aware this was a secret, sunshine.”

“You know what I mean.”

“Then what do you suggest we do?”

She chewed on her lip, that dream of hers returning in full force. “I…” Oh saints, Nikolai was going to think she was crazy, or a horny sex addict! “How about your room?” Well, there it was, out there ready for judgement.

Nikolai chuckled, “Why am I not surprised?” He kissed the corner of her mouth, “I suppose we could… If that’s what you want.”

“I don’t really want to go to bed alone, not after the day we had.”

“Well, my sunshine… I suppose…” He took her lips and kissed her for long, “We should go, yes?” His voice was every bit as desperate as hers.

Alina nodded.

And Nikolai took her up the stairs and into his room, their nearly-silent race interrupted by kisses every so often. Alina couldn’t get enough of this nor could Nikolai. All their encounters, all the dreams, all the jokes and moments of study… All of it had been building up towards this. Towards all these kisses and all the touching and what would follow the moment they fell into his bed.

Would it be like her dreams? Or better? Nikolai was a far better kisser than she’d expected. Which could only mean one thing.

“Oh, Alina…” Nikolai rasped against her lips as he laid her down, his hands skimming up and down her frame, “You are… magnificent. Truly… I wish I could put into words how you make me feel.”

Alina writhed under him, hands knotted in his hair, “Show me. Show me…”

“I will, sunshine. I will…”

 

* * *

 

Alina woke up wrapped in Nikolai’s arms. They were tight around her, keeping her warm after the previous night had spent all of her body’s resources. She was so tired, but so, so satisfied. She snuggled up and kissed his throat.

“Good morning, sunshine…” Nikolai rasped, his words vibrating against her lips.

“Good morning, Nikolai.”

“Sleep well?”

She nodded, “Better than ever.”

“I knew I was good for something. Wonderful to know it’s to give you good night’s sleep.” He joked before rolling them around just to kiss her cheeks. “You have the softest skin… And you smell like honey…” He said in awe before pressing his lips to hers for a brief good morning kiss.

“You smell like the sea…” She rasped, drunk in him. “What time is it?” If it was early enough… maybe they could…

“Breakfast time. I already heard Genya walking about, so no… _special_ orders.” He replied, as though he’d heard her thoughts loud and clear.

Alina groaned, “I could wait for the oncoming storm. They are all just… dying! Dying to grin at him with those… those grins of I told you so and those winks and…” She groaned, “It’s going to be hell.”

“What if I promise to hold your hand?” Nikolai offered with a peck on her nose.

“It’ll either make it better or worse…”

“Shall we find out?”

Alina sighed, she had to leave the room sooner or later. And it’s not like she wanted to keep Nikolai a secret, she just didn’t want all the knowing grins attacking her all at once. But then again… maybe that was for the best. Like taking off a band aid. Yes, like that. She threw a hand at him, “Fine. Let’s go face the wolves.”

 

* * *

 

In the end, Alina had underestimated her friends. There weren’t just grins and winks, there was a whole betting pool making the rounds. The moment she and Nikolai arrived downstairs, Alina caught sight of money trading hands and a very pleased Genya.

“I knew you two wouldn’t be able to keep it that way for long.” She said in a sing-song voice. “It was just a matter of waiting to see how hard you would fight it.”

Alina groaned and sank into her seat, Nikolai’s hand leaving hers long enough for a plate of blini to show in front of her. “You’re terrible.” She let out.

“Oh no, I’m a psychic. I knew it would happen within a day of arriving here. I saw the way your eyes lit up when you told us of the invitation.

Alina caught sight of a rather pleased smile dancing on Nikolai’s mouth and she quickly shot it to the ground with a kick under the table. “It didn’t happen on the day we arrived, so you shouldn’t be collecting money, Gen.”

Genya tsked, “I said within a day. Twenty four hours?” She winked and smelled her purse as thought it was full of money, “Zoya bet it would happen the very first night, right after everyone went to bed. But she didn’t count the marathon of movies.” Genya continued, pleased with herself, “Nadia and Tamar bet together on halfway through the trip. Harshaw…”

“Not you too!” Alina glared at her friend, who just shrugged.

“They were making bets and I just added my two cents. Genya roped me into joining the betting pool.”

Alina turned her glare back to Genya, “Let me guess, David too?”

“Oh no, my precious David thought we were being childish.” David muttered to his coffee mug something akin to ‘It’s the truth’. Genya blushed a little before continuing, “Like I was saying, Harshaw said we were being too hopeful considering how long it was taking you two, so he suggested it would happen closer to the ending. So, as you can see, I was right. And now I’m rich!”

Zoya scoffed, “You made barely enough to buy a coat for snow.”

“A fancy, faux-fur lined snow coat, Zoya.” Genya said haltingly.

Alina just looked at her friends, no humour in her face, “You are all just… terrible.”

“Aww, we love you too!” Nadia said, surprising Alina with a tease more typical of Genya. “Come on,” She added, “You’re like this just because you hate being wrong. Well, you were, big deal. There’s nothing wrong about that. Especially when it means you’re in love.” She sighed and giggled when Tamar kissed her cheek, “I think it’s wonderful.”

Alina shook her head and poked her blini, “I’m still mad you were all betting on this.”

“See it this way, sunshine,” Nikolai leaned closer to her ear, “They were all betting on us. Not against us.” She turned a little and caught sight of those damned eyes that made her stomach turn so much, “Which is a good thing, no?”

She blinked a little before rolling her eyes, thought it did nothing to prevent the blush that deepened on her cheeks, “Fine. I guess.”

And then Nikolai gave her a soft kiss, the room exploding with cheers. Alina wanted to groan at everyone, but she’d be damned if the kiss didn’t make her feel better.

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> rules of our world regarding jobs and university do not apply here ok? xD  
> also, Nikolai and Alina are magnets, pure magnets :D
> 
> comments/fangirling is the best thing ever <3


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